We all know someone who is difficult to please, makes rude comments, and typically has nothing nice to say. People who criticize others constantly are difficult to be around because of how mentally and emotionally draining they become. Dealing with these types of people isn’t always easy and can lead to defensiveness, but this isn’t the right approach. If you’re looking for advice on how to deal with critical individuals, you’ve come to the right place. Let’s discuss 8 strategies for dealing with critical individuals.
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Don’t Take it Personally
People who criticize others constantly typically reflect more about themselves and their personal beliefs than yours. It may appear that critical individuals are out to get you but it is likely that they act this way around others as well. If you believe someone is constantly being critical toward you and your behaviors, try taking some time to observe their behaviors with other people. Do they make critical comments and focus on the negativity around these people as well? If so, it is more evidence that this person just has a negative attitude toward life and their personal beliefs, not yours.
Listen and Look for Value
When you have a conversation with a critical person, are you listening to the message or just trying to leave the conversation? While it may be difficult to look past the criticism and negativity, there may be good advice behind the tone. Sometimes critical people may just be misunderstood and have difficulty expressing themselves. We recommend trying to focus on “what” is being communicated rather than “how” it is being done. This may lead to some valuable advice that you may have missed otherwise.
Accept Their Feedback
Like listening and looking for a valuable message, one way to look at criticism is by taking it as a source of honesty. If you look past the blunt delivery, there may be a kernel of truth that can lead to improvement on your part. Critical people are not always rude individuals, they may be extremely nice and honest people looking out for what is best for you. Accepting critical, honest feedback is helpful to you because it allows you to improve yourself.
Address Your Discomfort
Criticism never feels good but just like criticism from critical people reflects their beliefs, our inner discomfort reveals something about ourselves as well. Try to read your personal discomfort as a source of information for what is being said. If negative feedback is constantly hurting you, then it may be related to past events. If you feel discomfort every time someone criticizes you, try to sit down and understand your personal feelings. As you drill down to find the root cause, you will uncover truths and the root cause of your discomfort.
Disengage and Ignore
People who criticize others constantly may offer criticism even when you’re not asking for their opinion. When this happens, it is common to act defensively, but this could only lead to more of a heated debate. If you’re around someone who is constantly spewing negative opinions with no reasoning, it is best to disengage from them and the situation. If acknowledging that you have no interest in the conversation and they continue to engage further, then it is best to ignore them because they’re trying to get a heated comment out of you. By disengaging and ignoring, you are taking control of the situation and acting responsibly.
Be Kind
Sometimes the best way to address a person who is overly critical is by showing kindness in any way possible. By being kind to critical individuals, you may be providing them with feelings that they have never felt before. We don’t always understand why someone is critical, but it may be because it is hard for them to be positive. People who criticize others also criticize themselves, and on a much higher level. While kindness may not show immediate results, it could be a push in the right direction.
Communicate to De-Escalate
In a world driven by technology, it is common to receive criticism that comes via text, online, or email. You can take a proactive approach to the situation by de-escalating the conflict by talking face-to-face, video chat, or over the phone. Text messages and emails can be misinterpreted so when discussing a situation, it is best to use our voices and body language.
Stay Away
When all else fails and individuals continue to criticize and bring you down, avoid them. Reduce contact, limit conversations, hang out with other people, or as a last resort, cut them out of your life. You have a choice about how to deal with negative people and you can decide whether you want to be around this negative person. If you must be around this person because they are a coworker or relative, it is best to not engage with them. When it comes down to it, you have the choice of whether you want to have any contact and if this person should be a part of your life.
When dealing with people who criticize others constantly, it can be difficult to manage the relationship, but with time and the right strategies, it can be done. When dealing with critical people, it takes patience and understanding. After all, critical individuals are human too with their own set of values, goals, and ideas.
